Sometimes, being a gracious host can come back to bite you in the backside. While having a guest for a few days can be lovely at first, there can come a point when enough is enough.
Having a house guest is a major disruptor, but saying so is a difficult thing to manage. We don’t want to hurt the feelings of our friends and visitors, but we also want the solitude of our personal space back. Telling your guest that they’ve been with you too long is awkward, but there are a few cues you can use to indicate you’re ready for a change of scenery when the time has come.
All it takes is a little practice and a little know-how. You can have your space back in no time, but it’s going to take a little elbow grease and a little backbone.
The abstract stuff.
While it might be tempting to jump into the nitty gritty of the solid tactics you can use to oust that overstayer, let’s talk a little about the concepts you need to get ahold of first.
Boundaries, limitations and self-respect.
Before you can go about setting boundaries for your guests, you need to take some time to look inside and reassess your own personal boundaries, limitations and self-respect.
That sounds a bit hot. It is.
When people walk all over us (and do something disrespectful like overstay their welcome) it is because we allow them to.
The people in our lives only treat us as well or as badly as we demand, something which is determined by our self-esteem and personal regard. Respecting ourselves means setting clearly defined boundaries that the people around you know to stick to; disrespecting yourself…well, that’s when you end up with a permanent couch-surfer.
Before you can kick that bum off your couch, you’ve got to kick that bum out of your head. If someone is taking advantage of you, it is because you’ve given some kind of signal to the world that you’ll allow that, because you don’t value yourself.
Practice building up your self-esteem and realize that your space is your space. No one has the right to compromise the sanctity of your personal space and you have more right to it’s privacy than anyone else in the world (after all, you pay the bills.)
Learn to stand up for yourself because you love the person that you are on the inside and you deserve to be treated well.
Time is ticking. You can either waste it being stuck, or spend it doing the things that matter. by: E.B. Johnson Death is a familiar specter in life. It enters our lives the moment we’re born and haunts us until the final moment.